How to Feel Freer

It’s about that time when the pace of life begins to pick back up. Summer is coming to an end and the craze of back-to-school shopping, last minute vacations, and the pressure to make this summer the best ever is at an all time high.

Pressure comes from all different places—your boss, your spouse and kids, and even from yourself. No matter where it comes from, there’s no denying the physical sensations that pressure creates. Sometimes the stress is good, but I’d say we’ve become so accustomed to taking on the weight of outside sources that we’ve lost the ability to decipher what we actually need to bear. In fact, it’s not uncommon to even enjoy pressure. It helps drive us forward towards success and makes us feel important. We think that the more we can bear it, the tougher we become. In a blog written by successful Minimalism & Simplicity Coach, Rose Lounsbury, she describes it as this:

”You see, I learned early on to drive myself hard. Like a good American raised to believe I’m an individual who’s out there forging my own destiny by the sheer power of my will, I worked my tookus off in school. I got the grades to prove it. I got the college scholarship to prove it more

Later on I went all-in on the American Dream and started my own business, captain of my own destiny, carving out my own entrepreneurial chunk of the world. During this time, I also married a wonderful man and had three beautiful kids. 

But the truth is…

I accomplished most of these things while being quite harsh to myself.”

In her first few sentences, you can hear how it was “learned early on” and she was “raised to believe.” It’s a beautiful example of how we take in messages all the time and one of those primary messages (especially early in life) is that we must be pressured in order to move forward. So we take it all on. And I’m here to tell you, you don’t have to anymore.

You will always have the influence of outside sources. People will always say things and make requests to meet their own agenda. But, you always have the option as to whether you bear the weight of these demands. There’s a moment between when a request or comment is made and when you internalize it as your responsibility. In that moment, which is very brief, you can decide IF you want to take on the pressure, IF you want to take their need on as your responsibility. And in that moment you can decide. Which means, you can filter how much weight you’d like to take on.

It’s a powerful place to be.

Begin to take note of the things you can let go of to feel lighter and freer; the things that are weighing you down and stopping you from the things you’d like to be doing. What are the things you must do as necessity? What can you let go of? Give yourself a timeline and commit to the things that matter most. You will still feel pressure, but now it’s from the things you love, which creates a whole new feeling.

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